Day 4: Discomfort

Day Four


Hi Folks,   


We know this work is hard and uncomfortable sometimes, we’re sitting in that too.  But we also know that this work is necessary and so we will keep moving forward in our discomfort.  We will acknowledge it, learn from it, reflect on how minimal that discomfort is when compared to the frustration and fear that our black and brown friends and family feel on a regular basis and we invite you to keep moving with us.  


We heard from several people yesterday about the challenges of taking a stand on social media (on Tuesday) only to have the Black Lives Matter team ask us to remove their hashtag (they weren't upset about the campaign itself but the use of the hashtag was causing logistical problems). By participating in #blackouttuesday we had taken a stand and made ourselves vulnerable and to have that questioned or criticized in anyway was hard.  Let’s honor those challenges and fears, but not let them stop us. The fear of doing the wrong thing is the number one reason that ‘would be’ white allies stay silent in these times- when our black and brown friends and neighbors desperately need to hear our voices.  Ohavia Phillips had some great things to share about #blackouttuesday, it’s importance, what it means and why EVERYBODY is invited to participate (click the link and then scroll down to the June 2nd Follow Up).  


Day 4: 

We noticed, while listening to the event at the Gantt Center in Charlotte, “Unmasked,  We Can’t Breathe” , that  the list of folks who have died at the hands of police is longer than we expected.   Today we will be selecting a name off of that list and will “get to know that person”.  We will focus on their life, not their death.  We will get to know that individual, what she or he was like on the day before they passed away too soon.   Then we will share what we’ve learned about this person’s life with others.   We might write about the person and post it somewhere (though public social media may not be the right place for this- perhaps something more intimate- group or individual message, post in a facebook group, share with select friends and family),  maybe call several friends and share about the life of this individual with them, you might create a lesson, play, art piece, dance, poem, or song honoring this person, or in some other way showcase the person as to who they were outside of their wrongful death.  We are looking forward to sharing some of your stories with the group on the follow up.  


How to participate: 


  • Select a name that is now a hashtag, a black person murdered by police or neighborhood watch. 

  • Research their life, not their death. 

  • Share what you’ve learned about their life with other white people. 

Additionally Beth is attending Addressing Systematic Violence Against African Americans in Contemporary America is being sponsored by “Religions for Peace.”  from 12-1pm.  Camerin will be hosting a facebook watch party for Community Conversation hosted by SOLE Defined: Is the Dance Community Silent? at 5pm.  More info below, feel free to join us. 


If the action above doesn’t feel like the right fit for you, find another action you can take, please just do something! There are additional resources below.  We have also included a list of responses from day 2 and day 3, feel free to borrow for those ideas. 


Peace,

Beth and Camerin



More Reflections from Day 2:   Day 2’s activity was to participate in the BlackOutTuesday event on Social Media. Which can’t be done as it was on June 2, 2020.   However I wanted you to have the context for reading the reflections below.   

Day 2:   Today we are participating in Blackout Tuesday.  #blackouttuesday #theshowmustbepaused was an initiative started by two black women in the music industry: Jamila Thomas and Brianna Agyemany.  You may have already noticed your social media feeds covered in black boxes.  The idea is to take a break from music, dance and social media to honor the contributions of black music and dance artists to American culture. 


How to participate: 

  • Post the black box (three versions attached).  Use the hashtags #blackouttuesday, #theshowmustbestopped, we also used #thisiswhatlovelookslike and #blacklivesmatter.  You don’t have to do this to participate in Blackout Tuesday but it’s a great way to outwardly show your support. 

  • Avoid buying or streaming music or dance of any kind.  The idea is to send a message to the music industry about the importance of black contributions to these artforms.  

  • Stay off social media- take a break (boy could we use one) just for today.  Use this time to reflect and reach out to a friend.  Maybe call a black friend and tell them you’re here for them and look forward to listening- they might be ready to talk now or maybe you’ll be laying the ground work for a future conversation.  Write a letter to a white friend sharing your journey and invite them to be actively anti-racist with you.  We recommend these more intimate types of communication while taking a break from social media.  We are looking forward to really connecting with others. 

  • Learn more: TheShowMustBePaused website has a great list of resources.  Or maybe investigate the contributions of black artists to American music- I did a quick google search and found these three articles.  Please share additional resources: 


If this action doesn’t feel like the right fit for you, find another action you can take, please just do something! There are additional resources at the bottom of this email.  We have also included a list of responses from day 1, feel free to borrow for those ideas as well.  If the use of “Black Lives Matter” above made you uncomfortable- perhaps investigate why that made you uncomfortable- research the origins of the movement, what it really means and why the “All Lives Matter” response is offensive. 


Peace,
Camerin and Beth


PS

While this outward blackout sends an important message, marinate on how you can support and value black artists tomorrow.  Today we are attending the private event of a dance artist named Brandy and we’d love for you to join us.  The event is entitled “Listen” tonight at 7pm which seems like the perfect way to end a blackout day. Event information here. We have also attached information about another anti-racist event today at noon. 


Reflections on Day 2:  

  • I participated in the blackout on social media. Boy was it hard at some points. (apparently I check social media more often than I realized. Yikes!)

  • I sent emails to Minneapolis officials asking for justice for George Floyd. The emails bounced back this morning stating that the email addresses were no longer accepting emails. Meaning others have flooded their inboxes to the point that I'm receiving bounce backs! Now that's strength in numbers. 

  • I participated in #blackouttuesday (and edited hashtags)

  • Ensured we talked about this on my team call at work and our senior leadership team. 

  • Canceled a Zoom party tonight and blacked out on social

  • I struggled a bit yesterday (Tuesday) as there seemed to be disagreement even in the music community regarding Blackout Tuesday. Fear of doing the wrong thing….

Upcoming Virtual Events: 

 What people did on Day 3: 

  • I called a trusted friend to express my care for him which is not unusual in our relationship. I wonder about co leading Zoom listening circles with him, a black male pastor and chaplain, to give contained guided space for people to process emotions that are being triggered by the conflation of the pandemic and protests.  He is all in.  I’d like to hear thoughts from others about this idea. 

  • Studied a sermon by The Rev. Dr. Otis Moss III:  “The Cross and the Lynching Tree: A Requiem for Ahmaud Arbery.”  Here’s the link: https://youtu.be/l6985UG0Z3k

  • I listened to this interview with DeRay Mckesson on Pod Save America:  https://crooked.com/podcast/justice-for-george-floyd/ It comes around minute 40. It was so informative and made me realize how little I know about police reform. 

  • Today I checked out Childish Gambino/Donald Glover’s This is America https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=VYOjWnS4cMY#menu followed by Guava Island which uses the song in the context of a short film. It’s about an hour long, available on Amazon Prime.

  • I created a plan for this week, reading the list you sent of the tangible things that you can do that are anti-racist and followed some pages that will ensure I hear more voices.

  • I read some of the articles from the 1619 project

  • Today I have set up a recurring monthly donation to the Bail Project. I also engaged with a white coworker about what is going on in the world and challenged her when she started saying that "not all cops are bad and you can't judge all of them because some of them are bad”

  • I had an important conversation with my 10 year old about what is happening.  Now he wants to become a police officer and “make all of this better”.  

  • Today there is a peaceful protest happening outside of Cornelius PD. I'm planning on bringing a case a of water bottles down to those who are there. (It's going to be hot one!)

  • My work family marched yesterday and are planning to march tonight. (I'm working or I'd be with them.) I'm donating some money for sign supplies and for them to make first aid kits to carry with them.

  • I'm sending our own officials emails on police brutality and police reform. And honestly so much more. Will probably send an email everyday until I get responses.

  • I purchased Sing Me a Lesser Wound by Charlotte spoken word artist Jay Ward https://bullcitypress.com/product/sing-me-a-lesser-wound-by-junious-ward-inch-42/

  • Brainstormed with two people in my network how to show support given their home / family situations. They are new to this.

  • Today I went out and helped my trash guy line up some cans so he didn’t have to get out of his truck. Then I signaled with a heart that he matters to me.

  • I read “Between the World and Me“ by Ta-Nehisi Coates for an hour. Then, I meditated on what I’d read. It’s a powerful book.

  • I took the time to describe my experience of bringing a loaf of bread to our only black neighbor to my 12 year old and then discussed the difference between “not racist” and “anti-racist”. She had some interesting experiences of her own that were confusing to her.

  • I read and considered thoughtful statements from Carole Quillen (president of Davidson) regarding the death of George Floyd and impact on the school and statement of Rob Wilcox, Dean of the University of SC School of Law on the same subject.  



Reading List: 



Resources: 


Blog Recommendations: 

Squarespace

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